Growing concern as Elon Musk shaves head and buys a fluffy white cat

There is growing concern amongst the international security community after Elon Musk shaved his head and bought a fluffy white, strengthening suspicions he is a Bond villain.

The eccentric billionaire ticks all the required boxes for villaindom, not least the fact he is an eccentric billionaire. Add in his long-term ambition to colonize space and there’s a problem. Fears increased he is not even trying to hide it anymore with his rocket launched this week being given the ultra-baddy name ‘The SpaceX Falcon Heavy’.

Generic Belgian Interpol boss, Lieutenant Jacques Goodguex, remarked: “Well the signs are very clear. We’ve no doubt his Tesla operation is a front to trap us all inside autonomous moving prisons."

Goodguex continued, “And the fact he’s shaved his head, bought a fluffy white cat and posted a job advert on his Linkedin for ‘henchmen’ I'm afraid just confirms what we already knew.”